@Dawn_M_: If you say "guess who died?" with a big smile on your face some people get kinda angry.
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@HeyZeus666: Anyone who doesn't believe in life after death has never walked away from a lousy job.
@inmynewskin: I’m going on an all breadcrumb diet because I’ve never seen a duck with a double chin.
@JesKeepSwimming: "So tell me more about yourse-PUT DOWN MY FRIES IF YOU WANT TO WALK OUT OF HERE WITH ALL 4 LIMBS INTACT." - What not to say on a first date.