@squirrel74wkgn: If you see a man running down the street tonight, blowing a whistle & wearing a life guard shirt...don't worry, I'm just chasing my dream.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@markleggett: Denial. Anger. Bargaining. Depression. Acceptance. These are the five stages of learning that Ben Affleck is the new Batman.
@moose_chocolate: My daughter asked me what it was like when I was a kid, so I took away all her electronics and made her play with a Rubik's cube.
@WarrenHolstein: Having a traditional Columbus Day. Headed to a casino to hand out blankets with smallpox on them.
@ItsAndyRyan: Me: How long have we had that pillow? Wife: No idea Memory foam pillow: Two years, five months and two days