@bfrosty04: Prom night for my 17 year old daughter, or as I like to call it, 'Dad spends the evening sharpening his axe' night.
@bea_ker: You wanna see the most dangerous animal in the world mate? Go look in the mirror.
(I've locked an adult male puma in their bathroom)
@LaurelPlane: My gynecologist didn't think my ventriloquism skills were as charming as I did.
@GibJimson: If you ever see me cleaning out my car in the middle of winter, it's because I have drugs missing.
@ibid78: [commercial]
"I'm tired of fruits that taste good."
Narrator: GRAPEFRUIT
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