@Spaziotwat: If you stare at an ice-cube for long enough you can pretend you have laser-eyes.
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@TheAlexNevil: Judge: How do you find the defendant? Jury Foreman: Well...I guess I just look right at him. Why -- isn't that how you do it?
@KentWGraham: For parents, college is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand $100,000 from you or they’ll send your kid back.
@TheToddWilliams: [Eating ribs at BBQ Joint] "Would you like a Wet-Nap?" No thanks, I had one this afternoon.
@david8hughes: Her: I like smart guys Me [eats soup with a fork & pretends I understood Interstellar]: thats what happens if u get stuck behind a bookcase