@INDlAN_: If you think it hurts to lose a boyfriend/girlfriend, you've clearly never lost close to 500 GB's worth of data on your hard drive.
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@JasonLastname: If you rub two sticks together fast enough, you'll eventually start a widespread panic on the subway.
@pseudo_fred: I'm a man with a very specific set of skills. Woodworking, mostly. And so help me, God, I'm going to find you and build you a bench.
@TheToddWilliams: GUY: Do you want to play fantasy football? ME: Okay, I'm a quarterback with wings