@bingowings14: If you think Pi is 3142, then you're missing the point.
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@the_tsai_guy: If someone eggs your house, you can save time cleaning up by just baking your house into a cake.
@david8hughes: [leans over to kid watching Planet of the Apes in the theatre] Call them monkeys one more time & see what happens.
@QwertyJones3: [First day working in a warehouse] ME: What's that machine for? "Oh, that's the forklift" ME: OH MY GOD HOW HEAVY ARE YOUR FORKS??