@KeetPotato: if you walk up to a british policeman and play the benny hill music he legally has to chase you until you turn it off
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@LuvPug: I yelled "STOP EATING CAT TURDS OR IT WILL HURT WHEN YOU POOP!" & my dog stopped eating, so if you need a motivational speaker contact me
@KngHnryVIII: If God had wanted us to drink in moderation he wouldn't have put wine in barrels. #inspiration
@thenatewolf: Hot lady mouse looking for good time. Any mouse will do boy mouse or girl mouse. Groups preferred. Meet in woods AT NIGHT. Will be a hoot.
@joeyhuggles: My favorite response to someone asking how something works... "Magic" even when I do know how it works. Because Lazy