@Cali_Kid_Mike: If you want a waitress to leave you alone for a half hour, tell her you need 5 more minutes to order.
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@weinerdog4life: I'm not allowed at the gym anymore because I dropped my chili dog on the treadmill
@pakalupapito: roses r red violets r blue sunflowers r yellow i bet u were expecting someting romantic but no this is just gardening facts
@XplodingUnicorn: 6-year-old: Why do I have to share a room? Me: It could be worse. Harry Potter slept in a cupboard under the stairs. 6: Yeah. By himself.