@gingerfaced: if you want a woman to settle down with you be a cat
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@Caissie: My son on the morning of his prom: "Well, it just occurred to me that I paid $130 to go to my school at night."
@Reverend_Scott: October 31st, 2187: Sugar is now illegal. Parents search their kid's Halloween bags to make sure the razor blades don't have candy in them.
@david8hughes: I went to the movies with a girl last night. I paid for the tickets & the snacks, & anything else I can before she reports her card stolen.