@Sarcasticsapien: If you're going to insult the Amish, do it to their face. You kinda have to. They're never gonna see it online.
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@PeaceInTruth1: A car gets better traction in the snow if you throw a couple of coworkers in the trunk.
@Juicedballs: When Granpa revealed an exit wound scar from WWII it gave me strength to show him the owie owie bruise I suffered closing a faulty pizza box
@cathisamazing: Based on how I startle when toast pops up, I will never look cool walking away from an explosion.
@BlairLoudly: Your password must include 5 minutes of interpretive dance, 15 excerpts from contemporary fiction and 1 word made up by Shakespeare.