@13spencer: If you're walking down the street and see a teenager, don't panic; just yell "One Direction selfie twerk" and slip away in the confusion.
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@TheMichaelRock: We'd probably have a lot less crime if superheroes would stop making movies all the time.
@10InchesPlus: "Welcome to the Association Against Acronyms & Abbreviations, your office is this way..." - "We should call it AAAA!" "You're fired."
@just1fool: My only real regret in life is not pretending to be a shark in a heavily populated swimming area. But there's still time.