@robfee: If you've been unemployed for a while, update your resume to say youve been a Blockbuster manager for the last decade. HOW WOULD THEY KNOW!?
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@Brampersandon_: GIRL: Dad, I want you to meet my boyfriend DAD: Your bf is a bald eagle? BALD EAGLE: *adjusting toupee* I'm just a regular eagle actually
@Fickle_Filly: The next man who calls me deluded is going to regret it when he finds me sitting in his house wearing a wedding dress.