@SCBamaMan: I'll be signing books at the library tomorrow from 2-4pm (or until that librarian calls the cops again). Come on out!
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@Fred_Delicious: If a Facebook video says "you won't believe what happens next" then I replace "believe" with "care"
@dshack8: Pre-Having Daughters: *Hates hearing "NO" from women Post-Having Daughters: *Teaches them "NO" in 167 different languages including Klingon
@lasergirl70: My mom: "I'm going to wear your father's hearing aids tomorrow." Me: "You should wear them all the time." Her: "What?" Me: "Exactly."
@Faceyspace: HAHA ME AND MY NEW BOYFRIEND QUIT SMOKING TOGETHER NO ONE WILL GET MURDERED FOR SURE.