@envydatropic: I'll bring a knife to a knife fight because I have common sense. Idiots.
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@QwertyJones3: MY DAD: Foreigners in this country need to learn English. ALSO MY DAD: I heard you got a new hi-bird car.
@drewjanda: Son, your mother and I looked at your browser history. Frankly, it's not pretty. Do you for real need a walkthrough for Call Of Duty
@Instinctivetip: [marriage counselling] Her: he always thinks he's talking to me on CB radio Me: I don't, over Her: It's over Me: It's what? Over
@okimstillhungry: Me:*typing furiously* I've bypassed the firewall and I'm hacking into the mainframe now Arby's customer: So is my order placed or not Me: No