@Bizarro_Mark: I'll go to extreme lengths to get the last bit of toothpaste from the tube but I'll also watch 2 hrs of Nick Jr if I can't reach the remote.
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@FattMernandez: I got a bracelet that posts where I ran, and how far to facebook, and I put it on a deer. So it just looks like I'm lost in the woods.
@FatherWithTwins: 4yo: Raise your hand if you are young Me: *raises hand 4yo: No, daddy, not you.
@ILikeFaucet: Boss: Dan why is your hand raised? Me: can I go to the bathroom? Boss: Dan you're 23. This is a business meeting Me: so that's a yes?