@enigmaticmess: I'm a big fan of wood. Mahogany. Cherry. Walnut. Morning.
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@MikeCanRant: I wait til the mailman comes to send all my emails in front of him while keeping eye contact and whispering "Your end is nigh, letter boy."
@Mr_Kapowski: 90% of women that wear yoga pants probably don't do yoga. 100% of straight men don't care.
@PopeFrancisXXX: If Mary gave birth to Jesus & Jesus is the lamb of God, then did Mary have a little lamb?
@Storminika: Every time Nicki Minaj tells someone their voice isn't good enough on Idols, someone is crushed to death by the weight of the irony.