@sara_ashlynn: I'm a long-term thinker. For instance, the green bananas I bought will be delicious in 2 days.
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@truegritrumble: ME: *holding my crying newborn son* There. There. I ALSO find myself very upsetting.
@NewDadNotes: Dog 911: hello Dog: I accidentally ate the trash Dog 911: crouch low to pretend you are sorry Dog: but I'm not sorry Dog 911: I said pretend