@MaraWilson: I’m always surprised how long disco and early ‘80s dance songs are, until I remember cocaine
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@FaisalAdam_: In a parallel universe, cartoons are watching us and thinking "how sad, they die if you drop an anvil on their heads..."
@nachosarah: my new diet is not buying things at the store that make the cashier say wow someone's having a party
@thomas_violence: (after spending 15 minutes ripping a video off instagram and reposting it to twitter) who did this 😂😂😂😂😂