@Vice_Queen: I'm at a second grade music recital and this is by far the most effective form of birth control I've ever tried.
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@thatUPSdude: Hey people that knock on locked restroom doors, what are you expecting? "hey I'm taking a shit but come on in and join me"
@InternetHippo: If all millennials suddenly died the next day’s article would be “How millennials are driving up funeral costs”
@TylerLinkin: Yesterday I fell, landed on my back, and could not roll over and get up. At the time I was wearing a Turtleneck Sweater.