@1Bad_Scientist: I'm at my most British when she says "teabag me" and I drop a sack of Earl Grey in her mouth.
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@crushingbort: "Yesterday you were 3 Chainz and now it's 5 Chainz," Janet cried. "Where does it stop?" 8 Chainz frowned. "14 Chainz doesn't have time for
@Darlainky: [at lunch with friend] Friend: ... but you didn't hear that from me. Me: [looking up from my phone] Hear what? Friend: Exactly *winks*