@cynthiajones11: I'm at my most Michael Phelps when I find out someone has peed in the pool.
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@alliejane_508: I once left a love note on the wrong car, so yeah, you should totally trust me with important paperwork.
@krisv_723: The only thing between me & a killing spree is the fact that I'd have to poop in front of people in prison.
@ArfMeasures: ME: This car's perfect except for one thing WIFE: Yes, there's no room for the childre- ME: [finds cup holder] lol I was wrong, it's perfect