@peaceintruth1: I'm at my quickest when I try to follow someone out of the bathroom so I don't have to touch the handle.
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@MrSandeepP: I dont't want to die a virgin because that means I'll have to have sex with terrorists.
@Bad_Ass_Trucker: Women to the left of me Women to the right of me That's when I realized I was in the wrong bathroom
@MableGertrude: No one cared about leaving children in cars when I was young. I lived in the back of an old Buick with a pack of wild dogs until I was 9.
@DannyZuker: My son's soccer coach just said, "You can't spell "triumph" without 'try,'" and the look my son and I shared will bond us forever.