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@ArfMeasures: "We can't put it off any longer Alan, our daughter needs new shoes" CENTIPEDE DAD: [staring out the window] This is gonna bankrupt us Susan
@BRENTHOR: Interviewer: what would you say is your biggest weakness? Me: *high pitched mocking voice* what would you say is your biggest weakness?
@drinksmcgee: The date had been magic. We moved to her couch & kissed. That’s when horror struck as my eyes locked on the Duck Dynasty DVDs on her shelf.