@jjhartinger: I'm currently helping my husband look for his chocolates that I ate last Friday.
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@markedly: [talking with ex] Me: Is he more boring than me? Her: He is. Me: *devastated* How could you?
@Dani_Feld: Relationship status: I shout "PIZZA'S HERE" so the delivery guy doesn't think I'm eating two pizzas by myself.
@simoncholland: I feel like HGTV is creating some false expectations for the attractiveness of the contractor you hire for home renovations.
@BarryVonAwesome: The Hurricane came through here like a tornado -Lady on the News just now I don't want to live on this planet anymore