@ShockTartBionic: I'm like Jason Bourne, only I'm not looking for exits in each room.. I'm looking for outlets & phone chargers.
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@xLiserx: Ran into my ex on the street. He's got a hot wife & 2 kids. I have a taco in my hand. And one in my purse. And an emergency taco in my coat.
@llvvzz: Your psychiatrist's opinion about your social media habits don't count if he has less followers than you.
@Book_Krazy: Sam: Welcome to Multiple Personality Club. Sam: No one else is here. Sam: You're here. Sam: I'M YOU, STUPID! Sam: OK EVERYONE CALM DOWN!
@JamesHavoc: Sometimes I think we are capable of great things as a species, but then I notice how many people can't put their shopping cart away.