@bingowings14: I'm no sadist. Some of my best friends are sad.
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@bazecraze: Donald Trump was born when someone put a pinkie ring in a bag of Cheetos and left it in a lightning storm.
@ieatanddrink: I used to think I could control ducks with my mind but it turns out ducks & I just have very similar ideas about what stuff ducks should do
@HollyHeals: I'm doing it doggy style today. Lying on the couch not doing a damn thing. I will bark if you knock on the door.
@RealSudoNim: One of life's great pleasures is to watch two idiots agree on something and then hear one of them say "Great minds think alike".