@Asbo_Unicorn: I'm not apathetic, I prefer emotionally constipated.
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@VaguelyFunnyDan: Need expensive surgery? Tell a surgeon you're auditioning a few before picking one. Have them do the surgery then say "OK I'll let you know"
@SortaBad: Idea: a neck tattoo that depicts a man having an unsuccessful job interview because of his neck tattoo
@lovemydogduck: I'm so sick and tired of my friends who can't handle their alcohol. The other night they dropped me three time while carrying me to the car.