@NYC_Blonde: I'm not as tweet as you drunk I am think.
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@GodlessUtopia: "I'm not usually religious, but..." - Dan Mintz #LGBT #gayrights #equality #atheist #ReligiousFreedom . .
@AimeeHelene1: Hi, I'm a fruit fly that could live here undetected, but, no, I'm gonna fly in this lady's face til she makes it her mission to destroy me.
@owlcity: If I walk you home and kiss you goodnight, a simple thank you will suffice. None of this calling the cops crap.
@0point5twins: BARISTA: Would you like to try our new special Peruvian blend? It's sm- ME: I'm just trying to stay awake and not punch anyone.