@sageboggs: I'm not proud
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@joeldanger: Oh hey, sorry I accidentally rolled out of your bed, across your floor, down the stairs, out the door, into my car and back in my own bed.
@longwall26: Tonight, people who are weaker, slower, and dumber than you will deliver bags of treats to your very doorstep. Seize this moment.
@slaughthie: "Oh hey there, didn't recognize you with your cap on," I say flirtatiously to my toothpaste.