@WhaJoTalkinBout: I'm not saying four kids is too many, I'm just saying it would be kind of cool if I could melt them all down to form one kid, that's all.
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@SteveMartinToGo: Whenever I hear someone died of natural causes, I think, "Wait a minute. I have that."
@mattselman: If the United States ever collapses, the upside is that we can finally use the blue starry part of American flags to make wizard hats.
@Black__Elvis: My boss told me if I kept showing up late he'd give me a pink slip and I was like, how does he know about my tastes in women's underwear?
@SuburbanSleuth: I want a family beach vacation. Hubby wants a family ski vacation. Hubby showing kids video of tsunamis. But 2 can play. Avalanche anyone?