@DevilryFun: I'm not scared I'll end up in an asylum after a breakdown. I'm scared someone will record it on their phone and I'll end up on a GIF.
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@Steelers1972: I passed a homeless guy who asked "Any change!?" I said "Nope, your still dirty and homeless". We laughed and laughed and then he stabbed me
@Petote: Is that all? "I wanna stab you." Huh? "Cut your throat." What? "Drink your blood." Um. "Have your baby." Uh. "Kidding! I'll have a coke."
@Ms612: Fellas, if she asks you to sign life insurance policies on the way to your honeymoon, you're probably not making it out alive.
@Kendragarden: If I were gonna give advice about how to survive leaving your phone at home, it would be this: stare at something else. I chose a weird baby