@celebrityhottub: I'm on a plane with the dad from Home Alone and it's taking all my strength to not scream "WE FORGOT KEVIN!"
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@BruceForce: * Falls down rock face * Breaks legs. Bleeds profusely * Slowly reaches for pocket * Pulls out phone * Checks twitter notifications
@breatheandlove: Both her name and her living situation suggests that the dwarves MAY have been referring to Snow White when they sang, 'high ho.'
@TommyKarate: Local video store is offering a chance to win free iPads, so naturally, I reported them as spam.