@tayandmae: I'm opening up a restaurant called: I Don't Care, Where Do You Wanna Go?
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@sirivan: Everyone makes fun of Aquaman, but he’s got it all figured out. He spends all day chilling in the water. His life is one big pool party.
@TheTweetOfGod: People keep asking Me why I created mosquitoes. To bite you repeatedly and give you malaria, that's why.
@UncleDuke1969: Me: C'mon. Dog: No. Me: Let's go. Dog: No. Me: Please? Dog: YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?!? Me: It's just rain. Dog: I already pooped in your shoe.
@Dpressedspartan: My class teacher once said "Write and Practice." Turns out she was right. I practiced on my desk just before I started my exam and it worked