@POTerritory: I'm Phoenician, as in, "Nobody better stop me from Phoenician all of these donuts."
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@brittwastaken: Soccer mom:Is that apple organic? Me:No idea. SM: I hope you know the pesticides they spray on those will kill you. Me:*slowly licks apple*
@WilliamAder: When it's "buy one, get one free," I have them put the free one in a separate bag so I don't get them mixed up.
@Playing_Dad: *turns on shower* *shower whispers "eat donuts for breakfast" & "get drunk tonight"* Me: Wow, that's some serious water pressure
@hrtbps: My New Year's resolution is *removes sunglasses* 2048x1080. I'll explain. *perches on desk* You see, the word 'resolution' can also refer t