@galiamango: I'm pretty terrified of the possibility that you guys might crawl out of my phone like that girl in The Ring.
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@64spoons: Got CPR and CCR confused. Ended up playing "Fortunate Son" on my boombox while watching a man die.
@TheBoydP: Not to brag but a girl at this party said I look like the Hulk, of course it was when I was turning green from drinking too much, but still…
@AimeeHelene1: Kid behind me on plane kicking my chair and coloring. *turns around* *grabs one of his crayons* *slowly breaks it* *whispers "you're next"*