@CopBroughtPizza: i'm reading this thesaurus. it's really interesting, or should i say... very interesting.
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@simoncholland: Letting the grocery bagger bring my groceries out sounds nice but I can't handle trying to remember where I parked in front of a stranger.
@PaulyPeligroso: When skinny girls say "I'm so fat" to fish for a compliment from me, I just agree.
@Traceylei2: You know those orange cones they put on the road for you to knock over? Totally just beat my previous high score.
@Cravin4: There is nothing sexier than when she locks eyes with me as she finishes... ..Frying the bacon