@Coops_Bradley: I'm still not a member of Jem and the Holograms and that is truly truly truly outrageous.
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@poizngrl: The difference between kids waking you up and an alarm clock, is that you can throw the alarm across the room
@david8hughes: [son's football game] Other dad: which one's yours? Me: I can't remember. I just wait for him in the car when the games over
@TitansHomer: I'm the guy at the gym laying face down on the treadmill telling everyone "I'm ok, I'm ok"