@Coops_Bradley: I'm still not a member of Jem and the Holograms and that is truly truly truly outrageous.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@MartaEffing: [first date] Me: *sees he owns a cat* Him: Are you a cat or a dog person? Me: *maintains eye contact* *pushes cat off the table* *leaves*
@IamEnidColeslaw: trying to get through to Mozart on the Ouija board I really want him to listen to the Thong Song
@Brianhopecomedy: You're probably wondering how I tweet so much while maintaining a loving marriage and two amazing kids. The key is neglect.