@TitansHomer: I'm the guy at the gym laying face down on the treadmill telling everyone "I'm ok, I'm ok"
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@WilliamAder: My second account is trying to drive a wedge of suspicion between me and my Twitter crush.
@AGStr8upNinja: I don't play mario kart with my brother anymore. Because we are both in our 20's & my mom is not there to split us up when we fight.
@FrogAvalanche: Hi, Id like to buy a Nutri-Bullet, pls. Salesperson: Ah, nice. Off on a cleanse or health kick? Yes. *imagines drinking lasagna* For sure.
@BitchyJasmine: My neighbors loved the music so much when I turned it up, that they invited the police to listen. :)