@KevinFarzad: I'm tired of being told to remove my card rapidly. Starting a new ATM for people who wanna remove their card at a more chill pace
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@BlairLoudly: I've easily spent 12% of my life chuckling at my own jokes and being grossed out by my own body. Also, I like random percentages.
@Dani_Feld: The right response to "I'm a bit tied up at the moment" isn't "what are you wearing?" Apparently.
@ericsshadow: My wife ordered a pizza from Papa John's but I saved a step by throwing up before it got here.