@TheCatWhisprer: I'm wearing a push-up bra and can still only do 3 push-ups. Would not recommend.
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@TheMichaelRock: Boss: Why did you call off yesterday? Me: You said I should do what's best for the company. Boss.... Me: I'll take that promotion now.
@SaraThomas84: I'm convinced that people are now just getting married and having babies to have something to post on FB
@simoncholland: I feel like HGTV is creating some false expectations for the attractiveness of the contractor you hire for home renovations.
@Twtercide: Me: I have a date tonight. Friend: A guy coming over to install cable isn't a date. Me: *frowns* But I got a cheese platter....