@krisv_723: I'm wearing black today so powdered sugar donuts seem like a solid choice.
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@Smethanie: The worst things in life are free, too. Like, gonorrhea, chapped elbows and flyers left on your windshield.
@withanewname: psychic: "I see... I see kids in your future" me: "but I've had a vasectomy" [9 months later ... me tending a goat farm] "This's bullshit"
@Dutch_50: A co-worker is retiring, so they're passing a card around filled with cash. I only took $10 but normally my signature is worth much more.