@BasicLyes: Impractical Joke: Replace my girlfriends house cat's with mountain lions so she think's she is shrinking.
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@KevinFarzad: Every political Facebook status should start with, "First of all, I have no idea what I'm talking about."
@williamsonnier: customer: *looking at menu* what's good? me: not much what's good with you? him: ... him: ... me: chicken salad. the chicken salad is good.
@NotJPo: Listen up, single people. You can only sleep with so many people. Sooooo many people. So so so many.