@TheRolo: In California, there's just "pot" at the end of the rainbow.
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@PaperWash: Perfect Date: 1) Get kids out of the house 2) Light some candles 3) Burn the house down 4) Collect the insurance 5) Take her somewhere nice
@ColoradoCrow: Im going to change my name on Facebook to "Benefits", so that when you add me it will say, "You are now friends with benefits"
@timdonakowski: When a coworker tells everyone he proposed, I'm the guy that asks, "So, what did she say?" I'm funny that way.