@Vodkantots: In hell, every day is Thanksgiving and you're never allowed to unbutton your pants.
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@Cherbearxo: The secret to sustaining a happy marriage is to keep the mystery alive. So tonight I decided to clean something unexpectedly.
@MooseAllain: There’s been a fire at London Zoo. Apparently two stick insects were having sex and it all got out of control.
@Brampersandon_: [around campfire] ME: *grabs guitar* Hey kids how about a song? KIDS: Yeah! ME: ok *clears throat* LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR LET THE BODI