@canadasandra: in hell your cat can talk and he openly judges you for everything he saw you doing when you were home alone
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@HonestToddler: Tonight's bedtime story was about three pigs struggling with repeat home invasions. Thanks for the new fear.
@david8hughes: [wife gets in the car after talking with the priest] "What did the priest have to say?" "He said you have to stop rapping over the choir."