@edfoxcomedy: In space, no one can hear your spouse chew.
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@lloydrang: "I really thought by now we'd all have robots," he wrote, typing on a small device containing the sum of the world's knowledge.
@JimmerThatisAll: This day in history. 1924. Franz Kafka died after a surrealistically charged life which should have its own adjective. Kafkastic? Kafkable?
@katiefzack: If a guy runs his fingers through your hair, there is a 33.3% chance you are being used as a napkin.