@byrdie_num_num: Instead of "Juicy" I have "May contain gas" written on the back of my shorts.
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@DoubtTommy: how much morning wood, would my girlfriend suck, if she ever sucked and if I had a girlfriend. Whatever.
@warne888: When you're at someone's house? Normal people: "What a lovely house!" Me: "What's your wifi password?"
@skittle624: State Farm Like a good neighbor, stay on your side of the yard, pretend I'm not there, and let's have as little interaction as possible.