@TheTweetOfGod: Instead of looking for things that divide you look for things that bring you together, like the way you all look for things that divide you.
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@AristotlesNZ: 5yo: Can we go get a turtle? They're so cool! Me: Whats so cool about turtles? 5yo: They can breath thru their butts! Me: Grab your coat..
@Adam14: Calling a girl "honey" is ok. Calling a girl "bee vomit" is not ok. I'm a relationship expert.
@samalmightysam: Maybe Hitler became evil because he was mad that after so many years of lifting his hand nobody high fived him.
@daemonic3: [at Waldo's trial] Judge: Jury, how do you find the defendant? Jury: We the jury find the defendant by looking in the top left of the page