@pleatedjeans: Instead of yelling "Hello?" when u think a murderer's in your home, say "Goodbye" Then if he's there he'll be like well OK guess I'm leaving
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@themorris23: I wish I was as committed to anything the way infomercial actors are committed to over dramatizing their reaction to household chores.
@SortaBad: Roses are red Violets are blue Stop clicking your pen when you talk to me Kevin I swear I will murder your face with my tape dispenser
@MarfSalvador: Everybody always goes on about how Michelangelo painted the Sistine Chapel on his back but they never mention how long his arms were