@Eric_Bader: Insulting me gets you nowhere. Plus, it makes you look fat.
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@BreadFoster: Only in New York will they pay $5 a bottle for cold water, but cry when it's free from the sky.
@WilliamRodgers: Bro: Dude, is this YOUR Shakira CD??? Me: What? No....it's my wife's..... Hips: No.... It's his... Me: Shut up Hips!
@OutOfLeftField_: Ex: Do you ever think of someone else when we have sex? Me: No, it's always George Clooney.